What it means to hear someone lie

When I hear someone say that, "I've been up since 7 a.m. yesterday and I haven't eaten anything and I've cried 1,000 times since then," I feel cheated.

I've never done anything like that in my life. I don't think I've tried.

Sometimes I think about what it would be like to be so stressed out that I can't see straight, but then I think about how much I like life when I get something done the minute I think of it.

How do you put things off?

I think, to hear someone lie means to hear someone tell you exactly what they think of you.

I lie too. I don't lie to my friends or family or anyone really. Not that much. I try to lie. They usually catch me. Usually.

I think to hear someone lie makes you feel like you're better than them. In a small way. The smallest of small ways.

The way that you feel you should be in front of them in the line at the bank, or the way that you feel you have to power to tell them, "shut the fuck up!" in a crowded theater and they're talking on their cell-phone after the million dollar ad plays that asked you politely to turn off your cell phone.

It makes me feel like that person really hasn't done much to lie about. It means that I can feel better about utilizing my schedule and getting things done in a manner that doesn't require me to lie.

Or does it. Does it really make me feel like I'm better, no. It just means that I know a lie when I hear it. It means I know I'm better.

I'm sure that we all hear people lie and brush it off because, well, we're better than that.

When I lie, I make the mistake of not thinking over how I'm going to lie. I think that other, better, more seasoned liers spend a lot of their time thinking about how they're going to lie and all the ins and outs of their lie to make their lie the best lie of all the lies they've ever told.

If they've spent time telling lots of lies, I can't imagine how good next lie will be.

To hear a lie means to think about all the lies that you've ever told and all the lies that you're every going to tell. It means to think about every possible exageration that you can think of–every exaggeration that could be logically possible–and how you would implement that into a part of your life.

"I'm late as all fuck," doesn't count yet.

However, I could say that I'm late because there were, like, 20 billion dogs outside my house, all of which were taking a dump at the same time, and it stunk so bad, and I only had my $500 dollar shoes to walk through it all, and then, there were, like, 1,000 things wrong with my car, and, oh my god, I just wanted a sandwich.

That's all possilbe. That's whitty. Someone would buy that. I'm sure that I could pull that one on a girlfriend or random in a room and get a funny look.

That's what it means to hear a lie.